While I sit and wait for my iPhone to charge its final two percent, I thought I'd share my experiences so far with the world of online dating, and specifically, Tinder. Alright, I just checked, and it flipped to 100%, but I'm still writing this post. Anyway, last week Monday I decided to download Tinder and create my profile. I didn't actually get it set up until about 11:30 PM, and having a job and all, needed to be up by 5:45 AM, so I got as far as connecting my Facebook account, typing up a quick bio, and just briefly checking out the very first girl Tinder presented me with. Her name was Paige, 21, and currently attending UW-Oshkosh. She seemed cute, but I was too nervous to actually swipe right at the time, so I left it at that.
This brings us to the next day at, oh, I'd say... around 1 PM. I was in the middle of my work, had my phone sitting on my computer desk. Suddenly, I saw a notification from Tinder pop up, and it said "Someone has liked you! Swipe right to find out who." With this, I thought it literally meant swipe right on the notification to look at who liked me. I left that alone the remainder of the afternoon because I didn't want to be on a dating app during work, kinda awkward for me. I couldn't have been more wrong on the initial notification, but we'll talk more about that shortly.
At around 9 PM that night, I went ahead and looked at the notification, and again thought it would show who had liked me. It opened Tinder up, but to my surprise showed the same exact girl. Sticking with my initial assumption, I figured this Paige girl was the one who liked me since she was first on the app. I swiped right on her because she was attractive, but the whole "It's a match!" thing didn't pop up, so that clearly wasn't the one who liked me. Anyway, I decided to swipe either left or right on a few more, but had not yet arrived on the girl who liked me.
Fast forward to the next day, Wednesday afternoon at work again, I did some more swiping behind the scenes (I know, what a sneaky employee.). After about to or three swipes, I came across this girl named Anna, 19, who is attending UW-Stout for Studio Art with a minor in Performing Arts and a focus on sculpture. When I first glanced through her photos, I thought she was pretty cute and had some cool stuff going on in her life. I swiped right, and lo-and-behold, "It's a match!" popped onto the screen. HOLY SHIT, IT WAS HER is exactly what I thought as I discovered her. I had two options, "Send a message." and "Keep Swiping". I chose keep swiping as I had no idea how to start a conversation at that moment, so I left it for a little while.
By a while, I mean Thursday evening. Yeah, again the next day. Throughout the work day on Thursday I tried coming up with unique ice breakers, but the few I brainstormed were shit. Then, after remembering she loved Harry Potter, I figured I should use the dialogue from the scene where Ron Weasley is attempting to perform a levitation trick on a feather sitting before him in class. He's sitting next to Hermione Granger, and he says "Wingardium Leviosa!" with no success. I said that exact thing with some other funny stuff, hoping she'd come back with "No, no, stop it! You're going to take someone's eye out. Besides, you're saying it wrong. It's LeviOOOOsa, not Leviosaaa." so that I could respond with "Well you do it then if you're so clever. Go on, go on!" but she just said "That's so me as a wizard I swear" with 3 crying smiley emojis. Good enough for me though.
After that, I said some other HP stuff, but here's where things are getting a little dry. She never responded to my second message, so I waited until that evening where I followed up with "But anyway, UW-Stout, eh? How was your first year of college?" and yet still hasn't responded (I should probably also mention that she didn't respond to my first message that I sent at 6:30 PM until 10:20 PM, and I didn't reply until nearly 1 PM the next day... so... yeah. It's not that I purposely waited that long, I just was in bed early and took until my lunch break to finally respond.)
I'm reaaaaaally hoping she just doesn't go on Tinder that much, because otherwise I don't know what the long gaps are for, unless she's been talking to other guys already and lost interest in our conversation so soon, which I find hard to believe. I mean, I did change the subject to her schooling, so the ball is still in her court. I have every bit of faith she'll respond, because it's not like I left the chat at a loose end. I also hope she responds because she's got red hair that I don't think I've seen anyone else rock better than her, seriously. Plus she's just so damn pretty and I hope to develop this into a relationship off of Tinder. I realize Tinder isn't exactly what people think of as a way to meet his/her future spouse, but hey, why can't it be my way?
For real though, I'm holding onto faith that she responds, and I hope she does. This Anna seems like someone I could get to know well and take somewhere nice and show her what a fantastic gentlemen I am. I shall remain humble however. But I also got this. *thumbs up or fist bump or however to end this post strong and now get to sleep because I need it*
